Bardzo często przez to, że pracuję i studiuję czas na zakupy spożywcze jest bardzo ograniczony. Na szczęście mieszkam bardzo blisko Waitrose więc jak potrzebuję czegoś na szybkie śniadanie czy wieczorną przekąskę zawsze mogę w pięć minut pójść do sklepu – to jednak za często się nie zdarza ze względu na to, że jestem mimo wszystko osobą dość leniwą. Dlatego w lodówce mam zawsze kilka produktów z których w czasach depresji przed deadlinowej mogę wyczarować różne smakowitości!
I had quite a lot of stuff on my mind lately so I decided to go back to some of my all time favourite movies to relax and have some quality me time. There are some movies that even though I’ve seen countless times I still love going back to and I decided to share some of them with you!
I had issues with the way my body looks like for the longest time I can remember. There was always something I wanted to change about my appearance. Starting with too wide jaw, too big nose all the way to too wide hips and too big tights. Getting into modeling didn’t help my insecurities but also it made me realise that there are things that I might not like about myself but others do.
Throughout my entire university experience studying journalism and creative writing the one thing I hated more than food in the canteen were workshops. That’s because I’m nit a fan of writing narratives or short stories. I don’t do fiction or thrillers. I write poetry. A lot of poetry actually. And I ended up with a lovely group of people who didn’t really give a toss about poetry.
I have had a lot of things to do for uni lately because it is my final year and the question that was looming over my head for a very long time was how to somehow stretch out the 24 hours we all have during the day because it simply seemed like not enough. Then I found the waking up at 5a.m. challenge on YouTube and decided to try that but with my own spin. Because I usually finish work around 11p.m. waking up earlier than at 6/7a.m. is just impossible I decided to try the 6:30a.m.
I did talk a lot about how modling is bad for young girls and the way they end up perceiving themselves because of the industry. I talked about how my eating disorders couldn’t cause more trouble than during my modeling days , how mother agencies are sometimes not that amazing and how lonely it sometimes gets when you end up travelling for most of the year on your own.
Third year so far has been rather exhausting – trying to combine working almost full time with social life, university work and getting enough sleep proved to be simply impossible from time to time.
This is one of those questions that pops up from time to time and I never really know how to answer. Mainly because the story of me getting into the industry is not a Moss-miracle or a Delevingne-sensation. Probably because I wasn’t discovered, nobody bumped into me blinded by my beauty and skinny ankles or whatever other super skinny body part I posses.
I’m officially 22 now! God, I’m not ready but there are some things I managed to do before hitting that double twos and there are some things I’m actually proud of. Yes, that’s right I’m proud of myself for slowly becoming the woman I always wanted to be. And I’m not afraid to say it out loud or even scream it on a top of a mountain.
Recent months have been tough. It’s still not amazing now but I’m most certainly doing better. Way better. I achieved the stability for now through a lot of work on myself and focusing on my mental and physical health. It’s been a wild ride but I’m almost there.