I disappeared again for a while. Life got pretty hectic with everything going on at the same time. I guess I yet again got stuck in a loop of trying too hard to make everything perfect instead of just enjoying everything that was going on at the time. I’ve spent time questioning my choices when it comes to work and university and trying to end up with a perfect outcome on every single level of my life and so on.
I have disappeared for a while. For a long while to be fair and I think I am just about ready to be coming back to the blogging scene. Took me quite a long time, however life after you graduate gets rather messy and time occupying. I moved away from the town where I have spent three of the weirdest and most beuatiful years of my life. At first I was over the moon to move to a place where I can easily get a veggie burger at 3a.m. without even leaving the house but then what I didn’t realise at the time was that there won’t be the people around me I’d get that burger with.
Most of people who have stuck around since the very beginning of my blogging adventure know that I work as a waitress for quite a long time now. And even though customers can be a pain and sometimes I use every single fibre in my body not to burst out in tears after yet another table being very difficult on a Saturday night I used to love my job.
Sometimes we simply fall for the wrong people. Sometimes we simply don’t realize who is bad for us. Sometimes we forget to pause, okay he’s cute/ okay, they’re fun – BUT are they good for my mental health?
Being a student is… time-consuming.I rarely do have some time for myself to just sit down and relax but that’s also on me since I’m a workaholic. For the first time in two weeks, I had a day off and I decided to show you how a typical day off looks like for a journalism and creative writing student. Enjoy!
I had issues with the way my body looks like for the longest time I can remember. There was always something I wanted to change about my appearance. Starting with too wide jaw, too big nose all the way to too wide hips and too big tights. Getting into modeling didn’t help my insecurities but also it made me realise that there are things that I might not like about myself but others do.
I have had a lot of things to do for uni lately because it is my final year and the question that was looming over my head for a very long time was how to somehow stretch out the 24 hours we all have during the day because it simply seemed like not enough. Then I found the waking up at 5a.m. challenge on YouTube and decided to try that but with my own spin. Because I usually finish work around 11p.m. waking up earlier than at 6/7a.m. is just impossible I decided to try the 6:30a.m.
Third year so far has been rather exhausting – trying to combine working almost full time with social life, university work and getting enough sleep proved to be simply impossible from time to time.
I’m officially 22 now! God, I’m not ready but there are some things I managed to do before hitting that double twos and there are some things I’m actually proud of. Yes, that’s right I’m proud of myself for slowly becoming the woman I always wanted to be. And I’m not afraid to say it out loud or even scream it on a top of a mountain.
Recent months have been tough. It’s still not amazing now but I’m most certainly doing better. Way better. I achieved the stability for now through a lot of work on myself and focusing on my mental and physical health. It’s been a wild ride but I’m almost there.