I disappeared again for a while. Life got pretty hectic with everything going on at the same time. I guess I yet again got stuck in a loop of trying too hard to make everything perfect instead of just enjoying everything that was going on at the time. I’ve spent time questioning my choices when it comes to work and university and trying to end up with a perfect outcome on every single level of my life and so on.
On the bright side of things – being a perfectionist does sometimes pay off. I got my first MA grade back and my poem did very well as for something I hated so much when editing it! I managed to stay on top of everything when having actually no idea what I was doing most of the time. Keeping myself busy was always a thing I found took my mind off things I would otherwise overthink. The moemnt I can’t stop even for a second I end up not having the time to sink into depths of my mind which is still a mess with only some shelves being in a perfect order.
How do I stay productive when it’s mostly a way for me to escape from my thoughts? Easy my dudes. Not that easy, no, however it might be easier than it seems at times.
- (Yes, a listicle, because everyone gotta love listicles) Don’t think about the reason behind your productivity, just do things, work, see your mate in that five minute break between MA and internship work, the less you think about it the more it becomes a routine without being one. It teaches your mind not to focus on intrusive thoughts, which eventually manages to eliminate most of them.
- You end up being too tired to take a deep dive into your overthinking process because you are too caught up in overthinking work related things. Yes, yuo still think a bit too much about one thing but at least it’s not something that makes you miserable. Hopefully.
- I’m a poet and most of my poetry is sad and miserable and created by a version of me that is still 15 heart broken and crying myself to sleep so the moment I catch myself spiralling down I take a notebook and write the shit out of my sudden saddness. It’s a coping mechanism and also – art journaling is a thing and a poem a day keeps the sad thoughts away. Turn whatever bad emotion you’re experiencing into art – draw, sing, write, animate, whatever you feel like, save it or scrape it but let it all out first.
- When making yourself work doesn’t really work – it’s a;so important to remember that simple pleasures might work better when you can’t bring yourself to finsih that book chapter or writing the last sentence of your essay seems like too much. Go for a walk, watch a movie, eat that family size pizza all by yourself and give yourself all the credit for it. Only you can make you feel better and this is the key to productivity.
Being productive not always means doing things, it’s getting things done and to do that you need to be ready for it. Being productive is scrolling through pinterest for ages looking for the thing, it’s watching a movie to wake your mind up, it’s listening to your favourite music when you can’t bring yourself to turn the computer on and start your day.